Raw beef with questionable yellow bits.

Take That!

I just told a lady on the phone at a medical office that she sounded mean. It felt good.  She did sound mean, and I did not deserve to be spoken to with a gruff voice.

New Project: A 1978 Honda CX500E

Bought this trashed 1978 CX. It appears to have been stolen probably in 1979, then dumped at a NYC river (gross back then). The registration stickers say 1979. The odometer states only about 1400 miles. Washed off construction dust (from sitting in the garage of a building undergoing renovation).

It smells like a sewer.

The cooling liquid is bright green and the oil came out pretty clean.

The rubber hoses had to be peeled off everything. Used a thin screwdriver. And now trying to get the rear engine cover unstuck. I want to get the stator from it and use it in my 81 CX500c. Either that or just use this experience for when the 81 engine comes off.

Here are some images for posterity:

A New Bed

Before this year, I had never purchased a brand new bed for myself. At the age of 39 and having been diagnosed with a B12 deficiency requiring monthly injections for the rest of my life and fibromyalgia, the quality of my sleep should be of paramount importance. In fact, fibromyalgia pain often causes sleep disturbances, and poor sleep exacerbates fibromyalgia.

I remember being 5 years old and having trouble sleeping.

There have been occasional nights where sleep has been restful, usually after a night out of drinking. In college I remember sleeping well on days playing field hockey for 2 and a half hours. I might run for a half hour these days and lift weights in the gym, but that does little for sleep quality.

Recently, my upper back started cracking abnormally. A chiropractor had pointed out two points in the cervix, the second or third bone below the skull and another at the base of the cervix, where there were subluxations, or misaligned vertebrae. And one was probably responsible for the other. I guessed the lower one caused the upper one.

I used to go to the chiropractor whenever my neck would be stiff so that he could align my spine and make the crick in my neck go away. But when the cracking started to get more frequent, I stopped going. Now all I have to do is pull my shoulders back to make my upper back sound like cracking knuckles.

Then I discovered that if I placed a skinny stuffed animal, a fish, under my C7, near the bottom of the cervix, the stiffness in my neck would go away – instantly. Amazing.

It's been about 2 years now that I've slept with this fish under my C7. And when the fish loses its place, I feel pain in my neck and trapezius. Put the fish back, the pain goes away.

I can't keep sleeping with a stuffed animal under my back.

Finally, I decided to buy myself a brand new bed. Not just any bed. It had to be perfect. I'm like the princess who slept on 17 mattresses over a pea and felt the pea. (Was it 17?)

I also don't want to put any more plastic products in landfills. Besides, Tempurpedic mattresses are too warm after a while. Everything else in that price range is made with foam in addition to wood and metal.

Then I lied down on a horsehair bed. Oh my goodness. It was a Savoir bed. It's expensive. Hand made. All natural materials. Yet it's completely compostable. In reality, the compostable nature of these beds don't really matter anyway, since they are supposed to last a lifetime. Okay, so after I'm dead, it's good the bed is compostable. The bed I considered at Savoir was about $11,000. Holy s***.

Then one day, being walked to my motorcycle after a date, we passed by another mattress stores. Hästens. Holy cow. Another horsehair bed company. We go in. We lie down on mattresses. My body tingled.

At this point in time, my body was exhausted. My sleep was getting worse and worse, probably because the mattress I was sleeping on was too old and needed to go. (Unfortunately, another foam-top bed for Mother Earth.) My back was in more pain and I could feel the fibromyalgia symptoms – which I had learned to overcome – were starting to creep back into my joints. Daily exercise wasn't enough. I needed a new bed. But I didn't want one made with foam.

Hästens makes a model that is more affordable that I like, and they offer financing. It's a full size, which is a tiny bit smaller than what I had before, but I don't care. It's just me anyway.

I bit the bullet, signed the financing papers, and picked a fabric.

(Funny thing about the Hästens store in New York is that it's right next door to Savoir.)

Earlier today, May 27, 2011, the bed arrived with white glove service. Two guys came in, unpacked the boxes, set up the bed, and took the old one away. Now, I'm going to sleep on it. I can't wait.

Good night. :)

It just fits.

Review of Circus Circus, Reno, Nevada

Check-in was fast and easy. Front desk people were nice. Room was clean and didn't smell like cigarettes. In fact the casino on a whole didn't smell like cigarettes, though there were people smoking at the slots. Towels weren't soft, but they were clean. The bathroom wallpaper was peeling and the light was obnoxiously buzzing and bright. The bathroom had a vinyl floor.

The worst part was the styrofoam cups and "disposable" plastic coffee filters. Obviously no regard for the excess garbage in the US or for the environment.

The best part of Circus Circus...well, there were 2 parts that totally rocked: The poker room, which was just a sectioned off portion of the casino close to Keno and blackjack tables, was very welcoming. With a minimum bet of only $2 and staff that was very friendly and helpful, I played my first game of Texas Hold 'Em there and am so glad about it. I didn't play a tournament there, but the next time I played Texas Hold 'Em, it was a tournament. The experience at Circus Circus totally made it worth it. The second thing that totally rocked was the midway. It was so fun! And the games were inexpensive to play. Obviously there for the kids, but so fun. There were live acts that performed on stage and above on trapeze.

Circus Circus is at the northern end of the tract of casinos in Reno. It's attached to the Silver Legacy and ElDorado. We really enjoyed our stay and would consider it again.

B12 Deficiency

Often overlooked in the medical field, vitamin B12 is a necessary nutrient responsible for synthesizing red blood cells and getting oxygen to the body.

I've had a vitamin B12 deficiency for nearly half my life. I tested low for B12 at the age of 20, and despite different efforts to heal, my body refuses to hold onto it. As an avid meat eater, there should be no reason why I should lack the vitamin in my system. I have the intrinsic factor necessary for my stomach to absorb B12. For some reason, no matter how much I eat, my body refuses to utilize it properly. Over time, my body rejects it. Hence, I must take injections to stay healthy and active. Pills don't work for me.

Vitamin B12 comes from animal sources including some bacteria. It's a complex molecule with a molecule of cobalt as its center. Scientists have found the absorption process of B12 to be complex. So, there are many steps in the process where failure may occur.

Some symptoms of low-B12 has to do with the nervous system. I know my B12 is low when my hands and feet are burning hot, or if my body feels certain pains. Lately, I'm discovering that I have allergies.

To test and see if low B12 was cause for post nasal drip, I waited several weeks to make sure these allergies were actual allergies, and not an effect of work-related stress. I was sneezing constantly while at home. After my job got quiet and I was able to relax, the runny nose and sneezing was still happening. This morning, I took an injection.

Lo and behold, the sniffling and sneezing stopped. Could B12 injections be a prevention of allergies?

Everyone should have cathartic moments-- those times when we are overwhelmed by emotions until we reach a point of clarity.

I try to make sure that the people around me, the ones I let into my life, are honest with me and themselves. If they aren't, and I care about them enough, I will confront them and challenge them to be real. That's what happened this weekend with someone very close to me.

Challenges are never easy, or else they wouldn't be called "challenges." After my friend listened to me tell him he was "boring," he stormed out of the restaurant. I thought that because I could tell he had not been himself for some time. His passion had waned, and he became a person of rote and habit. I went after him, got him to listen to my argument only to convict myself of my lack of passion for what I've been trying to do, which is sell the book I just wrote.

It might not be easy to speak the truth, or say what we really think, but when we do our personal growth is imminent.

So, in the process of trying to help my friend, I found in myself the same flaw of becoming "boring." And I realized the having a success that is truly satisfying must have our passion involved. I've been passionless.

In the big picture, I can see where my efforts will lead me if I keep them up. But the satisfaction of my success can only manifest if my passion precedes those efforts. Now, I have a growing passion to prove to myself while my parents are still alive that I can accomplish what I want in spite of my upbringing. I used to want to prove it to my parents, but that was a miserable state of mind. Proving it to oneself shows solidarity and independence. There's freedom in that.

Whatever we have become slave to, we must overcome. But the only way we will know we are enslaved is if we open up to the truth, unafraid and unashamed. Carpe diem.